Final Fantasy Backwards
by Shellyyum
Summary: What is going on here? The evil league of FF badguys are trying their best to be evil(even more) but the goodguys keep poking fun at them..will Seymour ever stop hitting on Ayumi? and the quest to bring down Squaresoft....... Ed: Ed wrote that....
1. What did I say?

Disclaimer: I don't own any of the FF Characters or anything Squaresoft owns...if I did then i would be Rich! Rich i tell you!

Kuzuki:...

Cloud:WHAT?! _falls back_

Kuzuki: What happened?

Cloud: The author is just nuts I tell you!

Me-Phoenix: Whatever.._goes off to find coffee_

Chapter One: Never Mess with me!! and the Yuna Twins...

_in the center of the universe_

Sephiroth(sephy): TAKE IT OFF!!

Kuja: NEVER!

Me: Come on be a sport...

Seymour: what?

Seifer:-noooooooooo

Fred: we run the show here!

Me: whatever!

Sephy: _takes out sword_

Kuja: _happy_

Fred: attack mushrooms!!

_white mushrooms come and start trying to make everyone play with them_

Seymour: madness I tell you...Ayumi..

Me: Yup...I HATE THEM!ATTACK!!

Seymour: oh great...

Me: yup...I LOVE saying that..._smiles_

Sephy: _slashs at white mushrooms but they come back_

Fred: ATTACK! my lov-

Me: your in trouble fred!

Fred: that's with a capital F in my name...

Me: whatever...die villan! _dives towards him_

Fred: _dodges it as it hit the wall_

Seymour: _sits back everyone is going crazy over harmless mushrooms.._

Kuja: yup you said it...

Sephy: aren't you guys going to help?

_everyone stares at him_

All except Sephy: we'll pass...

Sephy: Oo some friends you guys are..

Kuja: besides -Ayumi! _picks her up_ what a silly girl...

Seymour: what she is so..._drools_

Kuja: Seymour your scaring me! she is only a girl!

_white mushrooms leave_

Fred: this place is boring!

Kuja: okay then seifer?

Seifer: _drunk asleep_

Seymour: not good..._holding onto Ayumi_

smack!!SMACK!!

Me: touch me again plant head and i'll hurt you...

Seymour: rubbing his face

Me: hehehe.

Seifer: _wakes up muttering_ i'll get you SQUALL!

Me: Leon.

Seifer: whatever! _goes back to sleep_

_door rings_

Sephy: _staring at the new door, which is lime-green_

Me: we have a door? _goes to it and Ikuro Junior(Jr.) is standing there_

Jr.: you own me Ayumi..

Me: it's Sora!(i changed my name...like anyone would ever listen...)

Jr.: whatever...

Me: i changed my -noooooooED!

Seymour: that kid again..._sighs as he is knocked out with Cloud's buster sword_

Jr.: MWAHAHAAH

Me: you evil little brat...FAYE!

Faye: you will pay! I brought everyone.!

Ed: ED IS HERE ALSO!!

Me: god no...

Sora(the real one): I'm the keyblade master!

Kuzuki: I am! _him and Sora fight_

Riku: is this the right place?

Me; you made it RikU!

Seifer: _is being poked_

Yuffie: is that Safe Leon?

Leon..er..Squall: Who cares...I hate him...he's the reason that Rinoa and me broke up...

Seifer: I didn't know she liked me better! I swear!

Leon...er..Squall: DIE!

Ed: great..._swings from high table_

Kuja: I'm leaving...

Cloud: think so? _falls down_

Faye: _glomps on him_

Cloud: why me?

Me: that's enough out!

Sora: _dead xx_

Kuzuki: i win...

Yuna: I love you Kuzuki! _hugs him_

Vivian: whatever you wanna be summoner from Tenel

Yuna: terra...TERRA! I live there!

Yuna(from FFX): What?

Vivian: Die Yunas! _fights with both_

Kuzuki: Strange... _sits down_

Me: LEAVE!! I -SEY -SMACK!! Touch me again and see what happens

Seymour: i was so close..._snaps fingers_

_everyone girl grasps_

Auron: do-_falls down as everyone girl in the whole room jumps on him glomps him_

Everygirl: WE LOVE you AURON!!

Auron: great..._Pushes them off leave with the other guys_

Washu: now it's game over!

Kuzuki: hey fellows want a drink?

_everyone guy nods and follows Kuzuki away from the girls_

_only Jr. is left_

Jr.: I'll stay here and s-noooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo _fires small pistols at everyone_

_two hours later_

Jr.: Hello?? anyone here?! HELP ME!! That's messed up...man!!

_two weeks later_

_as Yuna(from FF) walks with Tidus_

Yuna: I am so-_sees other Yuna_

Yuna Kitase(YK): NOOOOOOOOOOOOO _takes out sword_

Tidus: YUNA??

_both girls look up_

Tidus: Nevermind..._stares at Rikku_

Rikku: I am confused..._cries_

Tidus: KIMHARI!!

Kimhari:?? Kamhari is here!! Kamhari saves Yuna..but which one?

Tidus: same thing I was asking...

Yuna K.: YOU WILL DIE TRAMP!!

Yuna: whatever!!

Yuna K.:?

Jr: _jumps in from nowhere_ I will take my revenge!!

_everyone ignores him_

Jr: _cries _NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

Rikku: Kill him-NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

_a voice from the mountain top_

Me: hey that could be a song!! hit it Maester!!

Maester: Fine-

_the others push them away_

Jr: _runs away_


	2. NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

Chapter Two

Never say never! I made up new nicknames!! and someone is in my manor thingy...

Ed: _dead_

Faye: how did Ed die?

Sora: _asleep on his feet_

Faye: hey that rythmes!! ED IS DEAD! _sings a song_

Ed is Dead said Fred!! _every window breaks in every universe_

Ed: Ed isn't dead!!

Fred; you can't use my name anymore!!

Faye: why?

Fred: It's copyrighted!! _takes out legal papers_

Faye: it's just a fricking name!!

Fred: but it's mine!

Faye: wait-FRED?!

Fred: got to go!! _leaves_

Director: GO ON!!

Faye: kay...

_two hours later(I love the number two-no eight!!)_

Yuna:...

Yuna K: your fault...

Yuna: Kimahri!!

Yuna K: it's Kimhari...since last chapter!!

Kuzuki: TOO MANY YUNAS!! _runs into the wall_

Yuna: _rolls out tongue_ whatever...

_our first gang meets out with us_

Director: that didn't seem right...oh well..._plays up film again_

Yuna K: FAYE!! ED!!

Faye: Hey I got an idea!!

Yuna: what? _picks up what's left of Ed's mutaned(did I spell that right? NOOOOOOOOOOO!!) butterknife_

Ed: ED'S!! _jumps for it_

Kimahri: they spelled my name wrong! _cries_

_he shifts the whole worlds into chaos_

Faye: let's go to Guadosalam!!

Ed: why?!

Faye: I said so!!

Ed: this is going nowhere!

Seymour: this is our story!!

Sephiroth: YUP!

Seymour: yes...

Ed:...

Faye: So? We are stealing this story!

Seymour: never!

Ed: Pointy tree freak!!

Seymour: _cries_

_everyone laughs excepts for Seymour_

All:NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

Faye: _jumps onto Silver dragon that appeared from nowhere_

Ed: ed coming!! _does a flip and lands on Faye's head_

Faye: oh...

_The song Kung Fu fighting comes on_

_everyone dances to it_

Seymour: NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOblinks eyes See my No is longer then everyone put together.

Ed: Ed has nicknames!!

Faye: I like Faye Faye...even though it's annoying.

Ed: not that! for our new friends!

everyone stares

Seymour: Me? It's Seymour-or Lord Seymour Guado, high priest of Macalania Temple and Mae-

Ed: TOO LONG!!

Faye: _asleep_

Ed: _hits Faye_ How about? TALL POINTY TREE FREAK AND-_looks at sephiroth eyes nearly burn off_ How about God of Death?

Sephiroth: smiles

Seymour: I get that? and He gets that better name?! I'll kill you all!! _summons Anima_

_she doesn't come_

Yuna: HAHAHAHAHAHAH

All except Yuna: HUH?!

Seymour: is my Sweet-

Tidus _Jumps in_

Tidus: She's my girl!!

Yuna: dreamy face on I love you-

Faye: _pushes Yuna out of the way_ Anyway...I have this plan before Ed and Seymour cutted in...

Yuna K: Any-Call me Rena!

Faye: KAY RENA!

Rena:...

Yuna: what-_gets up is actually is helped up by Tidus_

Seymour: whatever

Sephiroth: What happened to Seymour's Aeon?

_everyone stares_

Director: what is up with the staring?!

N: Dunno.._eating sandwich still_

Director: why can't you stop eating?!

N: Dunno...

_plays up again_

_The song Kung Fu Fighting_

_in Guadosalam, in a few days_

_Faye, Ed, Rena and Kuja are walking to Seymour's house_

Faye: ...WOW!! _goes inside Seymour's house_

Tromell: HUH?! Who are you?!

Faye: we are Seymour's children..

Kuja: Yup...

Rena: Come on Gramps!!

Tromell: WHAT? Really?!

All except Tromell: Yup...

Tromell: I am so sorry!! _runs back in Closes door_

Kuja: Nice place...what's up with the old guys on the walls?

Ed: ED color!!_takes out a box of colors goes to Jyscal's picture colors him Blue_

Tromell: NO, don't do that! that's your grandfather!!

Ed: It is? Oopse..._slides away_

Kuja: Dad sure has a nice place...

Faye: I miss him!

Rena: Me 2! Tromell...

Tromell: Yes miss..?

Rena: RENA! _tells him everyone names_

Tromell: Lady Rena, what do you want?

Rena: how about the world?!

_everyone stares_

Kuja: you can't!

Ed: ED CAN!

Faye: No! _takes out pictures of Cloud and lines the walls with them_ My hunnie bunnie!! _dreamy eyes like Yuna before_

Ed: What?

Tromell: BED TIME!

Rena: what the hell?!

Kuja: Don't cuss Rena...you would of brought grandfather on his knees..._fakes a cry_ I MISS MY DADDY!!

Tromell: Don't cry..._hands Kuja a tissue_ So sad...wanna go to the farplane?

_everyone cheers_

All except for Tromell: YUP!!

_everyone runs to the farplane_

Rena: NICE!

Yuna: Yup...

Tromell: lady Yuna!_ bows_

Ed: not for una es Spoona!!

Faye: Una es Spoona!! everyone sings a song sings loud

Well!! My name was Yuna but it got changed by a brat on a sudden field of fiends...

_Sings out of tune_

_everyone covers their ears except for Faye_

Yuna: NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

_Auron appears_

_a giant swords slashes through the wall of the farplane_

Faye: can that happen?

Tromell: Dunno...

Ed:..._takes out Cloud's buster sword MWAHAHHHHHaaaaa packet of sugar falls out_

Faye: everyone run for the hills!

_everyone runs_

Seymour: what are these strange people are doing in my house?

Tromell: Oh Lord Seymour..thank Yevon that your children...

Yuri: Why did I have to shut up??

Faye: cause I said! _duct tapes Yuri's mouth close_

_white mushrooms come in_

Seymour: I have no children!

Kuja: DADDY!! _jumps on him and hugs him_ _and is still a crossdresser_

Seymour: AH! Kuja get off of me! You don't have a father!

Kuja: but you are my daddy!

Faye: cut it out Kuja...we are not related to the tall pointy tree freak!

Tromell:...

Ed: YUP! _runs up the stairs over and over again_

Faye: are we entering the Farplane or not?

Auron: I have a very big sword!

Seymour:...GET OUT!!

Auron: -

Ed: Ed has bigger!!_swings Cloud's_

NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

Author Note: I did it for the safety of my peers...no one got hurt...badly...really!! everyone leave the building!!

_author runs away_


	3. Really Long Title thingy

Chapter Three

Shave me and-Ed's really long sword!! and many insane ideas...brought to you by Faye and Fred of the White Mushrooms

And Jr's revenge! MWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA _clears throat_

Faye: wow that's a long title...

Ed: Ed made it up by herself! _put paintbrush down takes out butterknife_

Seymour: get him off of me!! You Gay crossdresser!!

Kuja: daddy, i didn't know you cared! _bats eyes_

everyone stares

Rena: NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOoo

_film cut_

Director: I am sick of everyone yelling no! Doesn't anyone got more to say? What do you think N? N?!

N: _head pops out_ What? _eating sandwich_ Crucky...

Director: N?

N: Dunno..._goes back to eating sandwich_

Director: that's not a word!

N: is now! _takes out Daniel Webster_ Make it in the dictonary!! _points a gun at his head_

Director: N!!

N: Shut up!! _shoot himself dies becomes a unsent_ MWAHAHAHAHAHAH

_Daniel Webster starts up the play-or story thingie up again_

Faye: FARPLANE!!

Tromell: We were just there...what more do you want?

Kuja: cries N-it edited to be Monkey Poop MONKEY POOP!!

Seymour: Okay..._hugs Kuja evil glint in his eye throws him over the farplane Laughs evilly_

Rena: Seymour...?

Faye: What about his Aeon?

Seymour: Aeon? What Aeon? _evil smirk_

_kuja raises up on silver dragon_

Kuja: Thought you would get rid of me don't you Seymour?! HA!

Sephiroth: _slashes through silver dragon_

_silver dragon is actually a balloon_

Kuja: CRAP!! _flies away with the balloon_

Sephiroth(Sephy):_ leaves_

Auron: _is asleep outside_

_everyone except for Kuja and Seymour Backs away_

Faye: I am leaving!! _grabs Ed's giant butterknife_

Ed: _cries and Hits Faye on head_

Seymour: I am so gla-_stares at Faye_

Faye: YOU POINTY TREE FREAK!! NEVER!! _Does a Kung-Fu Fighting Phrase screams really loud Wahy!!_

Ed: That's Ed's!! _a scene plays up and Ed dreams of dancing with his butterknife in an open field_

_scene stops_

_two years later_

kind of,...not really! I was kidding!

Jr: I will get my revenge!!_ laughs like a madman_

Fred: HEY FAYE!!

Faye: what? takes out giant ravor(Did I spell that right? NO!!-I mean Monkey Poop)

Yuna: NO-MONKEY POOP!!

Ed: Stay still!!

Jr: what about me? _gets hit in the face_

SHAVE ME!!

Jr: _cocks gun_ I shall kill!!

Ed: _wraps Yuna around with duct tape around chair shaves her hair_

Auron: _jumps to save her but gets a buzzcut_

Faye: EVILNESS!!

Yuna: _cries_

Fred: Sorry got to kill you all!

Faye: NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO _everything ends_

Author:...?


	4. Another Long titledarn

Chapter Four

Seymour! SEYMOUR!! I want to steal your necklace! By none other then Edward Wong or Ed for short...Because Ed likes longs titles like this. And Faye's Monkies!! Arrival of The crosserdresser-wait didn't he already appear? Yes! and also..Finishing of Jr's revenge... nooooooooooooooooooooo-Monkey poop and Squaresoft's take over of FF!!

Seymour: NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO _gets hit by Director Monkey poop!!_

Kuja: Daddy, let's take a shower together...

Seymour: _hides in his room_

Faye: now that's just sick man...

Seymour: _yells from door_ How did he get out of the farplane?!

_everyone points to Dumb Tidus_

Tidus: i didn't d-Oh Kuja get your clothes on please!! _eyes burn_

Faye: Guadosalam sucks!!

Rena: It does after Kuja runs naked through the town...

_everyone turns their eyes_

Ed: LONG TITLE!!

Faye: Makes no sense as always...

Ed: Nope-N!!

N: What? I am-_Eating sandwiches_

Faye: Can I talk to Daniel Webster??

N: NEVER! HE IS MINE!!

Seymour: Tromell! through door still Kill him!! _opens door alittle points to Kuja_

Tromell: Yes sir...Kuja-Chan- this way! _evil grin_ (Wait Tromell is evil now?) (Damn you..)

Faye: DIRECTOR!!

Director:..._drags N away_ Sorry for that..._blushes_

Seymour: Tromell!!

Ed: enough with the yelling!! _takes out Cloud's buster sword_ Feel my wrath!

_monkies come in_

Faye: Go monkies!!

_the song Kung Fu Fighting Plays up again as the monkies do Karate phrases_

Ed: the horror _cries and tears out her hair_

_song ends as Maester Kinoc comes out_

Faye: _cocks gun fires at him_

Kinoc: NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

Faye: _stops_ He can say that? And we have to say Monkey Poop instead of No?

Director: _sniffs hundred of bills in hands_ What?

Faye: Nevermind...I should try bribing the Director...

Seymour: KILL Him before I DO!

Ed: what happened?

Yuri: The...damn writer!! KUJA!! NO-VIVI!!

Vivi: looks up What? _stops writing_

Yuri: STOP!! _rolls duct tape all over him_

Rena: _summons Anima_

_anima comes this time_

Seymour: Why didn't my mommy come for me?! _cries_

Vivi:...My bad.._Throws down typewriter runs away_

Yuri: Hey you can't!

Vivi:oh yeah.._remembers that he is trapped_

Jr: Kill Kinoc!!

Kinoc:You can't-

_Anima Kills him_

Yuna: I am Bald!! _jumps around waving her arms_

Ed: No.Una Es Spoona!

Seymour:My necklace is gone!

Tromell: Kuja! _hit him_

Ed: _hides Seymour's necklace under her pants_

Seymour: _sees Ed hiding it Give it back! dives at him forgetting Kuja is still naked_

Me: sad...

Faye: Ayumi!! Damn you Vivi!

Me: Sora

Faye: whatever...

Daniel Webster: You can't trap me for long!! _hits Ed's Buster sword_

Ed: I killed him...awesome...wait wrong guy...

Kinoc: _becomes unsent_

Yuna: _still recovering sends Kinoc_

Seymour: Not me _Leaves_

_Anima leaves Anima comes back_ a_gain_

Yuri: I can talk again...

Jr: Everyone forgets me_...sniffs_

_in Squaresoft_

_the evil Yoshinori Kitase (Producer of FFX) decides to make a new character with the help of Tetsuya Nomura(character designer)_

Evil Yoshinori Kitase(EYK): How about we..._evil grin_

Evil Tetsuya Nomura(ETN): Yes..let's...MNWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA

EYK: that's enough..._slaps ETN_ Shut up.Listen to me! I will rule and make evil FF Character feel my wrath!!

_laughs into the known universe_

_back to everyone else_

Seymour:..._Screams when he sees himself fading_ What?

Faye: Th-Squaresoft!

Ed: Let's...eat some chicken!

_Monkies leave_

Fred:...Not me..._screams_

Kuja:_ is drawn with clothes on_ NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO _hands Director fifty bucks_

Director: kay...

Tromell: HIDE!!

Jr:..._fires at everyone_

Ed: _runs into hiding_

_evil typewriter is still going_

Ed:..._comes back_

Yuri: Why can't I talk? _hands Director two hundred dollars_

Yuna: I AM STILL BALD! _dismisses Anima_

Ed: we must...

_Seymour disappers_

Jr: we must stop them!!

Faye: yes...

Ed: ...Kay...

Me: I am not.._gets dragged by Faye, Yuri, Rena, Ed, Jr,Fred,and Vivi_

Author: ._is gagged and dropped into lake_

Director: nice..join us next time...

N: yup _eating sandwich still_

_EnD!!_

Yuri: Let's kick some Squaresoft butt!! _stares How did Vivi get loose?_

Vivi: My magical mystical duct tape remover!!

Yuri: enough said...

Tromell: WHat about me?

Faye: Go away Seymour's man slave!! _hits him_

Ed: DADDY!! _eats a ton of chocolate that is found in her shirt pocket_

Kuja: Why aren't they messing with me?

Ed: maybe because they are afraid of you...

Kuja: that makes sense...

Fred:...Why Do?

All except for Seymour, Tromell, Kinoc, and Daniel Webster: You're from Kingdom hearts!!

Fred: small voice I knew that...

Auron: _wakes up_

Dumb Tidus: What Did I do? _cries and sucks thumb_

_everyone leaves him_

Jr:what now?

Faye: kick some Squaresoft ass!!

Ed: Ed got Seymour's necklace!!

Yuri: good job...

Rena; Finally..I had to get rid of Yuna...She was bugging me...

Faye: she would...being the daugter of High Summoner Braska

_everyone does the Yevon bow_

_then the world stops as they enter Midgar_

_In Shinra HeadQuarters_

Rufus: Damn Squaresoft for messing up everything.._.bites the end of a pencil_

fat guy that laughs like santa Clause(FG): Rufus!

Rufus: what?

_door opens_

_Ed is leading the way_

Rufus: stares What now? FAYE!

Faye: we need supplies now!! It's-

Rufus: I know...Sephiroth was redrawn into a girl...bring out Sephiroth

Sephiroth(Sephy):now a girl What did they do to me??

_everyone points to a giant sign that says Squaresoft_

Sephy: Oh...

Rena: anyway..can you hook us up?

Rufus: I see..._hands everyone weapons_

_everyone leaves_

Rufus: good luck!! _shuts door_


	5. These titles are making me dizzy

Me-Phoenix:NOOOOOOOOOOO *hugs computer screen*   
  
Kuzuki: Please don't......  
  
Me-Phoenix: Shut up!   
  
Kuzuki: man your messed up.....  
  
Chapter  
  
Square and Enix join forces and try to stop our group from killing off the evil mutant ninja neon green bunnies. And Ed still have Seymour's necklace, and Mog's Moggle flute thingie!!!! and Jr still WANTS HIS REVENGE!!! (In caplocks!!) and tonberries attack!  
  
Faye:....  
  
Me: why did you drag me along?!!!!  
  
Ed: dunno......  
  
Mog: I am hungry....  
  
Vivi: SHUT UP!  
  
Yuri: I wasn't doing anything!  
  
Vivi: Liar!  
  
Faye: shut up!  
  
Jr.: I still want my revenge!  
  
Faye: shut up about that....! *hits Jr with a ten inch pole*   
  
*where she got it, the world may never know*   
  
Me;......  
  
Faye: Why does that keep happening?!!!!  
  
Vivi: Who knows...  
  
Rena: darn things........  
  
Jr: Where is Squaresoft anyway?  
  
*everyone realizes that they are wandering in the desert for some time now*  
  
Fred: man I should call on my slaves..  
  
*white mushrooms popped out from behind Fred*  
  
White Mushrooms 1(WM): What? You ever said we were your slaves!!!!  
  
WM2: Yeah Leader Fred...dup!  
  
Faye: specialness....  
  
Ed: Not a word!!! mwahahahahahahahahahahaha  
  
*a gaint sandstorm blows over everyone*   
  
Rena: just our luck...  
  
Ed: yup...*eating banana...  
  
Yuri: *still has Vivi tied up*  
  
Me: I wanna go home!!!!!!  
  
Everyone except Ayumi(Me: Sora!!!!)or whatever: WE HAVE TO DEFEAT SQUARSOFT!!!  
  
*a t.v pops out and the storm goes away*  
  
Ed: what is this?  
  
T.v Man: This just in the..game thingies Squarsoft-I mean Squaresoft and Enix are forming Square Enix  
  
*everyone screams*  
  
Faye: damn them.....bringing in those bastards.......  
  
Ed: no cussing! *puts to the fic*  
  
Faye: yeah yeah but it was needed.  
  
Yuri: I am so glad I got connections...  
  
Vivi: yeah to-*gets whacked by the duct tape*  
  
*T.v Leaves them*  
  
Rena: is that thing-Hey we can stop at Limublum...  
  
Yuri: you baka that's not how to say it........  
  
Faye: we know what she means.....  
  
Ed: *put s a Qu mask on*  
  
*scares everyone*  
  
Vivi: put that away!!!!!  
  
Fred:...............special..anyway here i go....  
  
*mutant ninja neon green bunnies pop out*  
  
Director: why does everything have to pop out at everyone?Can't we change that-N!  
  
N: *still eating sandwich* Dunno...with that evil typewriter still going.....  
  
Director: yeah your right old buddy....  
  
Jr.: We're screwed.....  
  
*Mutant Ninja Neon Green Bunnies (MNNGB) Attack them and strapped everyone to a chair making them watch Freddie Prince Jr's movies*  
  
Faye: the horror! the horror!!!!!!!!  
  
Ed: *covers eyes*  
  
*everyone stays this way for 15 hours straight*  
  
Fred: i can't take it anymore!!!! *kills the MNNGB with his hidden flamethrower*  
  
Rena: why didn't you tell us that you had one of those hidden?  
  
Yuri: My tape loves Vivi  
  
Vivi: get over it Yuri.....  
  
Faye: we have to save! *takes out Moogle flute*  
  
*the player presses the Square button and Mutoe(whateve his name is) comes running to everyone*  
  
Mutoe: Okay you wanna save, use a tent, mognet?  
  
Faye: we'll save!  
  
*the game saves and Mutoe leaves*  
  
Rena: I didn't know we were capbale-I AM SO CONFUSED!!!!!!!!! *cries*  
  
Ed: don't crey!!!!!!  
  
Yuri: that's not a word....  
  
Mog: It is now...since Ed is taking over Daniel Webster's job  
  
Vivi: I love tape-NOT!!!  
  
Me: Why me?????? this is plain stupidity!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!  
  
*everyone looks at her*  
  
Faye: what do you know?  
  
Vivi: i can't control it!!!  
  
Yuri: what?  
  
Vivi: that damn evil typewriter....it's got *damatic music plays* a mind of it's own *thunder sounds in the background*  
  
Mog: we are no closer then before....we're lost aren't we??!!!!  
  
*no one says anything*  
  
Faye: maybe not....*sees Quale* Shit run for the hills everyone!!!  
  
*everyone runs from Quale*  
  
Ed: and if-nooooooooooooo Butterknife!!!!!  
  
Rena: I see a tonberry!!!  
  
Tonberry:*moves slowly*   
  
*3 hours goes by and everyone is still waiting on the tonberry*  
  
Faye: will you hurry up??!!!!  
  
Tonberry: *raises up chef's knife and slashes Faye*Dionk!!!  
  
Faye: OH NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO *dies*  
  
Yuri: *gives her a phoenix down*  
  
Faye: thanks....  
  
Fred: no one ever revives me when I die! it's not fair!!!!! *cries* *cries harder and drown tonberry*  
  
Rena: mushrooms can cry?  
  
Ed: fraid so!  
  
Vivi: a sick and twisted end for us all....  
  
Ed: On the bright side I still have Seymour's necklace!!! *grins*  
  
Faye:.............kay.  
  
*Quale catches up*  
  
*everyone summons Silver dragon*  
  
*everyone jumps on silver dragon and takes off for....yeah where Regent Cid rules....*  
  
Faye: *presses the square button on her controller*  
  
Mutoe: Save?  
  
Faye: yes!  
  
*game is saved*  
  
*Mutoe leaves*  
  
Rena; how did you get a controller? When was this a game all of a sudden?!  
  
Vivi: that's a good question.......  
  
Faye: well you see...i don't know! it just sort of came at me....  
  
Ed: it's SquareEnix trying to ruin us...  
  
Yuri: curse them....  
  
Kuja: yeah drawing me with clothes...  
  
*everyone stares at the floor*   
  
Faye: how did you get here?  
  
Kuja: I was with you guys...  
  
Yuri: really?  
  
Director: I can prove what Kuja's saying is true!  
  
Vivi: wait aren't I free?  
  
Yuri: your not anymore!   
  
Director: Maybe I can't.......  
  
All except Director and N: SHUT UP THEN!  
  
Faye: this can't be any good...da-I mean darn it....  
  
Kuja: but I am helping you guys!!!!  
  
Faye: fine...  
  
*everyone slowly heads into Alexandria*   
  
Dagger: Who are you?!  
  
MNNGB 1: HAHAHAh you will surrender your kingdom to SquareEnix!!! and vow total all-*coughs*  
  
MNNGB 2: Let me take off where 1 left off...what was he saying? Oh..and if you don't we'll rewrite your precious kingdom!! into...The Disco Era!!  
  
Dagger:*begging* Anything but that! Please!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!  
  
Zidane: Calm down-oh great help just arrived..  
  
Faye: what can we do?  
  
Ed: Ed likes shiny stuff...*steals Dagger's necklace when not looking**hides it with Seymour's necklace*  
  
Jr.: Everyone hates me?  
  
Rena: yeah if you just shut it!!!!!!  
  
Dagger: stay with me!  
  
Director: damn that's enough for this chapter...  
  
N: *still eating sandwich* Dunno..  
  
Director: *sweatdrop* 


	6. Evil forestness!

Me-Phoenix: I am....scaryness!!!!!!!!!!!!  
  
Blackmage No 3: KILL!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!  
  
Kuzuki: what?????????  
  
Me-Phoenix: baka!!!!!!!!!!!!! That's Kuja's....I mean SquareEnix trying to ruin us run!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!  
  
Chapter 6  
  
Me like Aeon type-thingies and The black Mages from hell and turning a funky groove....baby  
  
Zidane: We're screwed...  
  
Kuja: not with me! _walks slowly and trips on feet and falls on face  
  
_Rena: what do you think?  
  
Faye: we can do something...I think?  
  
Ed: _looking at Dagger's necklace_  
  
Dagger: give that back. Please?  
  
Ed: kay....  
  
Jr: why does this happen???????????????????????????????????????  
  
Faye: enough with the question marks already!!! We get the picture!!! _sweatdrops  
_  
Fred: what now?  
  
Zidane: can't you see????????  
  
Faye: _hits Zidane in the head  
_  
Zidane: ooohohohooooohhhhhhhhhhh!!!!!!!!! _touches Faye's, Rena's butt gets whacked back_  
  
Dagger: hahah that's what YOU GET...  
  
Faye: Wha???  
  
Ed: squareEnix.....shit hey I thought we went to where Regent Cid ruled?  
  
Faye: we did..  
  
_flashback  
_  
Rena: wow…  
  
Cid: help me..  
  
_end of flashback  
_  
Fred: that was a fast visit…  
  
Ed: me know..  
  
Kuja: why me????   
  
Zidane: your not the one is trouble or anything…remember Dagger-I mean Garnet???  
  
Dagger: yeah the NMNNGB are threatening to ruin my country and turn into_..grasps_ Disco Era!!  
  
_everyone screams_  
  
Vivi: the horror we had to endure doing the Seventies. the horror!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!  
  
Faye: yeah  
  
Rena: ……………..  
  
Fred: I loved _gets hit by the director  
_  
Director: it wasn't me……_smiles innocently points finger at N  
_  
N: Dunno..._eats a taco now  
_  
_everyone gasps again  
_  
Faye: that's amazing…okay whatever_..pushes back Director and_ N  
  
Rena: What do you say Ayumi?  
  
Me: Sora  
  
All expect Me: WHATEVER!!!!!  
  
Dagger: okay help!!  
  
Faye: we're doing the best as we can…._grumbles about Dagger being a spoiled brat and know it all   
_  
Dagger: what???  
  
Rena: shut it…..we'll hand it..  
  
Kuja: Me-  
  
Ed: Not!-  
  
Fred: you!!!!!  
  
_black mages are down below planning a attack on Dagger's kingdom in the evil forest_  
  
Black Mage No.23 and a half(BM 1/2): hahah they won't know what hit them!  
  
BM 3/4: What your only half?   
  
BM 1/2: what?? I thought we were helping Kuja take over-wrong person...isn't it-?  
  
_both tremble  
_  
BM 3/4: don't say their names....oh well...wait...isn't the evil forest...like ummm....AHAHAHAHAHAHA  
  
_the whole forest goes after them  
  
they both run and fall on their faces_  
  
BM 1/2: we are doomed!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!  
  
_saved by someone in a dark cloak   
_  
BM 3/4: SEYMOUR!!!!!!!!!!!!  
  
BM 1/2: Nope!!!!!! I think? stares  
  
Dark cloaked stranger: ?? I'm-ulls off Cloak Seymour!!!!!!!!!   
  
BM 3/4: were screwed!!!   
  
BM 1/2: yup...  
  
_the forest dies_   
  
Seymour:.......................I'm looking for Ayumi!!!  
  
Me: _pops out_  
  
Me: Sora..._goes away_  
  
Seymour: Ayumi? oh..Sora.....whatever!!!!!!!  
  
BM 3/4:..................................................................................................  
  
BM 1/2: I'm leaving....  
  
_Meanwhile back in Dagger's home and kingdom   
_  
NMNNGB 1: too late! _pops out with ray guns_  
  
_everyone stares_  
  
Director: is it..or does everyone keep staring?   
  
N: _not done with his taco_ dunnno.....  
  
Director: Not a word!!  
  
N: _pulls up N's Dictonary  
_  
Director: okay i get no where with you..........   
  
NMNNGB 2: you can't win!_ ray gun goes on and everything turns into The Disco Era   
  
_Dagger: NOOOOOOOOO _gets a fro and a funky outfit_  
  
Faye: it's not all that bad........except for the sun turning into a giant disco ball....stares

Kuja: _Adjusting silver fro_ I dig you baby   
  
Zidane: oh please..._tries to get off Fro but it's stuck_ damn them!!!!!!!!!  
  
_Ed: uneffected_ huh?  
  
Jr.: _is effected_ damn it!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! _hits kuja for being an idoit and for that last couple of chapters for thinking Seymour was his daddy   
_  
Me: I'm fine..maybe because i had reflect on?  
  
_everyone gives her death glances   
_  
Dagger:.................  
  
Rena:.........?? _touches her hair_ EVILNESSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS  
  
Faye: we got bigger problems......_points to the evil forest's vines climbing up to Dagger's kingdom that starts with A   
_  
Jr.:I thought? SEYMOUR????  
  
Kuja: DADDY!!!!!!! JK!!!!!   
  
BM 1/2: RUN FOR YOUR LIVES!!!!!!!  
  
BM 3/4: YEAH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!  
  
Seymour:..AYUMI!!!!!!!!  
  
Me: sora!!!! IT'S SORA!!!!!!!!!!!!  
  
Dagger: NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO  
  
Director: hey i thought I cut it off?  
  
N: Dunno......  
  
Ed: _summons Silver dragon_   
  
_everyone except the people of A(dagger's kingdom) is saved for the Evil Forest's vines_   
  
Director: we'll take it-  
  
N: MY TACO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! _becomes a giant machina robot, 20 stories high   
  
the Forest's Vines run away in Terror as they get rip into shreds  
_  
_everyone stares  
_  
N : _goes back to his normal form_   
  
N: I'm happy now......  
  
Seymour:..........Sora?  
  
Me:.......screwed!!!!!!!!!!  
  
Faye:..i give up..............let's go to Quale's Marsh!!!!!!!!!  
  
e_veryone cheers _


	7. Marriage now? HAIR TODAY!

Me-Phoenix: Not another thing!  
  
Kuzuki: chapter man!!!! Chapter!!  
  
Me-Phoenix: whatever!!!  
  
Chapter 7  
  
I'm going to marry his hair-don't write that crap!!!! Anyhow, never dare mix Lord of the Rings and FF together-madness!!!!!!  
  
_In a scary shrink's room_  
  
Frodo: I thought maybe-  
  
Shrink guy: yeah yeah short guy....  
  
Frodo: aren't you listening????  
  
Shrink guy: yeah!!!   
  
Frodo: whatever...  
  
_in thousand miles away_  
  
Faye: I still think my fro is fading away..  
  
Kuja: how can you tell?  
  
Faye: _points to it_   
  
Kuja: oh.....  
  
_silver dragon flies them over The Shire  
_  
Ed: this -going crazy  
  
Yuri: this doesn't look right to me.......  
  
Vivi: _still struggling in the duct tape_ I'm pissed cuz I wasn't in the chapter 6!!  
  
Yuri: not my fault.....Seymour took your place!!!! NAHAHAHAHAHA  
  
_everyone stares_   
  
Yuri: not my fault....  
  
Fred: neither was...so stop complaining!!!!!!!!!!  
  
Rena: OH MY GOD!!! PARTY!!!!  
  
_everyone jumps off the silver dragon_  
  
Dagger: Party? Yup!! I almost forgot it's my birthday!!!  
  
Zidane: _touching fro_ yup....and mine also...  
  
_all the music stop and all hobbits stare at them  
_  
Frodo: HUH?  
  
Ed; Ed says Party!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!  
  
Kuja: make way!!!! _pushes hobbits out of the way  
_  
Dagger; what about my kingdom?????!!!!!  
  
_everyone does a triple stare_  
  
Director: is that something new?  
  
N:.............?  
  
Director: I forgot you don't know nothing either.....whatever! Wait-it's the work of that stupid typewriter right?  
  
N: not me....still typing...sir...  
  
Director: whatever......  
  
_back to everyone_  
  
Jr.: FREE FOOD!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!  
  
Bilbo: Who are you?  
  
Dagger: I'm Princess Garnet til Alexandros the 17 or Dagger..  
  
Zidane: me Zidane!!  
  
Ed: Ed!!  
  
Faye: faye.....in capital letters!!!!! _screams_  
  
Kuja: the most wonderful-  
  
Yuri: that's Kuja, he's an idoit, who loves himself....can't see why....._trails off_   
  
_tells everyone their names_  
  
Frodo: what are you doing here?  
  
_they give him a double stare   
_  
Faye: to stop the Evil Square Enix!!!!!!  
  
Ed: that too!!!!!!  
  
Bilbo:................?Oo  
  
Vivi: don't give me that look!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!   
  
Yuri: _hits Vivi with huge boulder that appeared out of nowhere _and still this pointless story has to go on!!!  
  
Rena: yeah..really....I'm sick of it....  
  
Fred; the NMNNGB are planning an assault led by Seymour!!!  
  
_everyone keeps staring_  
  
Director: that's it!!! Enough with the staring!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! _hits everyone  
_  
N: Sutjghlhi   
  
Director: what the hell? That isn't a word......  
  
N: _points to word in the dictionary Under Sutjghlhi_  
  
Director: It means someone that holds a Narrator under pressure? What the hell does that mean??????  
  
N: like it says..  
  
Director: you just fucked up the English Langu-fine with me!! _gets hits  
_  
Dagger: excuse me!!! But this is about us not you!!!  
  
_in the background the evil typewriter is still going_   
  
_everyone screams as a giant tomato falls_   
  
Faye: did they spell that right?  
  
Ed; Dunno...Who cares???   
  
_the giant Tomato rolls down the Misty Mountains and it turns out to be a Bowling ball!!!(BB)  
_  
BB: I'm here to roll on you!!!  
  
Bilbo: dies  
  
Frodo: WMAHAHAHAHAHA Now I can-  
  
_everyone stares at him  
_  
Frodo: _fingers ring_  
  
Faye: didn't sound right!!  
  
Rena: nope....but that's something Kuja might do....  
  
Kuja: SHUT IT!!!!!! You don't know what i do-  
  
_everyone gets nosey  
_  
Kuja: backs away I shouldn't have said anything......  
  
Vivi: yupness!!!_beats the crap out of Frodo for the ring and goes on silver dragon and destroys the ring  
_  
Fred: that was fast man....I bet-  
  
Faye: on our way!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!  
  
Pippin:...? CAN I COME???  
  
Ed: ED's new friend!!! _fakes a tear_  
  
Faye: whatever...  
  
Pippin: YEAH!! LET"S KICK SOME ass!!!!!  
  
_all hobbits gasped  
_  
Pippin: Stupid-  
  
Yuri: enough!!!  
  
Vivi: I get all the ladies-just kidding!  
  
Zidane: that's my line!!!!!!!!!!!! _hits him_  
  
Me._shakes head_   
  
Faye: _singing loudly_  
  
Una es Spoona repeats that for ten more seconds Well!!!!!!!!!!!!!! My name was Yuna but it got changed by a brat on a sudden field of fiends...then i......man..damn....er......thinks for a moment The road-  
  
N: _holds out dictionary_  
  
Director: that again......_shakes head_  
  
Frodo: what happened to Sam?  
  
_fifty miles away, Sam is about to be thrown into a volcano by natives_  
  
Ed: _Laughs_  
  
Rena: I'M SICK OF YOU!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! _reaches over and hits N for being an idiot  
  
_Me: I'll just stay out of this..  
  
Jr.: _blow nose_ THE HORROR!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!  
  
N: what did I do? _drops taco  
_  
_roaches come out and eat it all_   
  
_they leave without anything left behind_  
  
Director: if I have allergies...or whatever...I'll make everyone suffer!!!!!!!!!!! MWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!  
  
BB: What about me? I'm supposed to roll on everyone!!!  
  
Faye: go away!!! BB!!!  
  
_A tonberry comes again_  
  
Pippin: What the hell?????  
  
Ed: something stupid _takes out huge chef's knife   
_  
Pippin: _had no idea what Ed just said there_  
  
Ed: KILL!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!  
  
Faye: cut that out..get it cut it out?  
  
_everyone looks at her like she's crazy(A/N: she is...)  
_  
BB: I WANT MY MOMMY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!  
  
_everyone leaves_   
  
Me: And now A Ed and Faye moment......  
  
_scene starts_  
  
Faye:...............................................  
  
_sees Godzilla  
_  
Ed:...?  
  
Godzilla: WHAT? ROARRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!  
  
Faye: what? Oo..........  
  
Ed: don't ask me.........................  
  
Godzilla: RUN! Damn it!!  
  
_everyone stares at Godzilla_   
  
Faye: should we or not?  
  
Ed: dunno....................  
  
Godzilla.:............................................._runs away in terror_  
  
_everyone still stares_   
  
Faye: that was just special...  
  
Ed:.........??  
  
_end of the moment_  
  
Me: back to our-NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO _runs away hits a wall_  
  
_everyone returns back to Faye's house_   
  
_only for soda and food since they ate all of the party's food_  
  
Me: pigs!!!!!!! _pushes Jr. off the couch_  
  
Jr.: WHAT THE????????  
  
_Seymour and Kuja jump in through the window_  
  
Seymour: Did we miss anything?_ turns t.v. on to watch playboy  
_  
Kuja: _changes it to the cooking network_  
  
_everyone looks at him_  
  
Pippin : _passed out on the floor_  
  
Ed: _in a food coma laying next to Pippin_   
  
Yuri: _outside with Vivi   
_  
Seymour: what-  
  
Faye: HEY!!!!!!!!! Someone has been going through my bras!  
  
Kuja: _hides them_ I don't see anything _smiles innocently_   
  
Faye: hahahah whatever _throws her remaining bras at him leaves_   
  
Kuja: wha? _gets blank stares from Seymour  
  
_Seymour: nothing..._when Kuja is not looking. He grabs for one of many Faye's bras sniffs them   
  
kuja turns around to see Seymour putting them away  
  
_Kuja: hahahah your still a guy afterall.....  
  
Faye: thats it! _hits both Seymour and Kuja drags them into the closet where the black hole is_Yeah yeah...that's what they get..  
  
_black hole sucks them up_  
  
Jr.: _speechless   
_  
Yuri: wowowowowowowowowowowowowow _hot lava is on her tongue_   
  
_Zidane and Dagger are strapped to the chair wih thier arms, legs and waists tied with metal chains  
_  
Ed: _wakes up with a evil smile_ MWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH  
  
Pippin: _mumbling in his sleep_ I don't wanna go school today! I wanna stay home and bake cookies with you!  
  
Ed: _shakes head and does a flip_ I WANNA GET MARRIED!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!  
  
_everyone wakes up  
_  
Faye: to who?  
  
Ed; Seymour's hair!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!1  
  
Seymour:.................Oo XD  
  
Kuja: yeah I wanna be the best man!!!!!!  
  
Faye: I get to be the the maiden of honor!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!  
  
Ed: Ed's so happy-wait how did Seymour and Kuja get back?  
  
Seymour: we'll never tell!!!!!  
  
Faye: you bribed the black hole again?   
  
_they both nod_  
  
Vivi: on with the wedding!!!  
  
Author aka Me-Phoenix: That's all!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!   
  
Ed: can't be! We haven't decided where to have it yet..  
  
Faye: Bevelle  
  
Seymour:_ pissed_  
  
Kuja: let's shave off Daddy's hair!!!!!!!!!!!!!!  
  
Zidane: _laughing _


End file.
